Well it’s been months since my last thread filled and locked but I’ve seen little need to start a new one. It’s just been easier to hijack others. but that’s not always the best idea. So after hearing this very interesting discussion on the radio this morning and then looking further into it, it very much reminded me of comments and discussions made here. And that meant put it in your own thread Don.
It all started with a survey from Axios. I’ve perhaps heard the name but I know nothing about them. The questions they asked, however, were very related to comments, statements and some discussions here, including loosely some that were made yesterday although I think that was more so in good fun and banter.
But they asked 850 about dating and specifically would you date someone that voted for Trump or Hillary or Biden. It’s been said here by multiple people how they’d never date a Trump voter. I found that not only interesting but also hard to be common. Turns out, like many things these days, it actually depends on whether you are female or male, your age and whether you are republican or democrat. Shocker. But it’s still interesting.
According to their study or survey or whatever only 5% of republicans said they would not be friends with a democrat. I find that totally plausible as I talked about on CWs thread yesterday. OTOH 37%, or 6 times more, of democrats would not be friends with a republican. Hmmmmm interesting. When it came to dating 71% of young democrats would not go on a date with a republican!!! Nearly three quarters - just as some here proved some months back with their comments. I still find that amazing. But again when flipped 31% of republicans, would not date a democrat or less than half of the other way around. Nearly three quarters versus nearly one third. That’s a huge difference, especially again coming from the tolerant, co-exist side of the house. Pay attention to what people do, not what they say, or the bumper stickers they have I guess. Im still struggling to wrap my head around this even if I should not be. Living in strange times.
Not marrying I could see. Not getting serious, perhaps. But just rejecting out of hand and not even giving a chance? There used to be all sorts of married people with different political beliefs. But that was before we started turning our world upside down as my title refers.
In other news I decided to give the IRL lady a second chance and sent her another message. I would call, hell she said to call. Problem is I don’t have her number. Oh and for those who said I should have set the date right away. There is often things you don’t factor or know. Like where we were, who was standing there with us - maybe her kids? So without details trust me it would have been very out of place and awkward given the circumstances. Anyhow she messaged back right away this time apologizing. She was going to respond right away the first time, didn’t and then forgot. Of course what does that say. She would not likely forget if interested, though that Cupid fit her personality. But she offered up Sunday. So that’s a plus. Sadly I have a gig followed by a packers party if I’m still up to it after this very busy weekend. Her mom is also going through some issues which is taking up her time.
So, is the universe trying to tell me something? Sadly even my interest is falling. Reality often can’t compare with the fantasy I’ve concocted. But I’ll still go and see what happens if we can get our schedules to cooperate. But D’d a few years - and I still don’t know why though it seemed to happen quickly. He cheated and she tossed him out is what’s been hinted to me by her friend. But kids are still young teens. And she’s a foot taller than me. No not really but it does feel like it sometimes.
Met up with some high school friends after thanksgiving- including 3 or 4 total quality women who are very happily single. And I do mean very successful - one had an office in the Whitehouse and did missions with Airforce one. Still lives in DC before someone suggests I should have asked her out. My actual point again from a different thread is there are more happily single, not at all looking to date, women out there. At least I had a GREAT time with all of them and hope we do it again soon.
Anyhow so now I again officially have a thread. That should last me at least another year - unless I meet someone this weekend and decide to post about it now that I have a thread and actually can. Or I could tell you about the last few - including the “I think sports rivalry is one step away from bullying” woman who clearly fell in the surveys 71%. And I am performing in the most liberal city in the state this weekend so my chances appear to be 29% or less than 60% she will even talk to me. Does it make it harder or easier if half the women on the planet won’t go on a first date with you no matter what?
Okay, well in keeping with the title of this thread… just heard a reputable report (following talk about this persons comments regarding slapgate on Sunday) that there are all sorts of women throwing themselves at OJ Simpson - yes even OJ has weighed in on slapgate. Anyhow, The TMZ type report, though NOT fromTMZ) claims dozens of witnesses seeing OJ out in Vegas, Florida, etc. with young, middle age, and older women throwing themselves at OJ, apparently desperate to sleep with, date, hook up, etc. with him. It is a pretty common siting evidently. The reporter then commented on the upside down world we are living in. In a world where woman are desperate to hook up with OJ is it any wonder what the rest of us encounter trying in to date? And not just women, I’m sure it follows through to men as well.
Wow! Living in strange times indeed. Well he is tall.
Is it me, or are hospital working environments a hotbed for this stuff?
Originally Posted by LH19
So I have a friend who works in a hospital and he said it’s a known fact that the Firemen sleep with all the nurses married or not.
Apparently the fire fighters are a hotbed too.
Of course, a rumour without a leg to stand on will find another way to get around.
I think the frequency of cheating, affairs, etc. is pretty well homogeneous across all sectors and work environments. The root cause is after all, people.
Once you notice this stuff, it really jumps out. And that does skew our perception somewhat; like noticing that car everywhere. Still, what incident rate would be considered low or acceptable?
Then add in other unethical actions, theft, corruption, embezzlement, coercion, slander, perjury, the list goes on and on. Oh my, such hotbeds.
The strangeness of the times, is from how normalized this has all become. IMO.
police, fire, medical ... yup, higher stats for infidelity. adrenalin junkies ?
another thing I wanted to comment on is that a commonality among these people is that there's a distinct lack of gratitude for what they do have. They're so focused on what they perceive as a lack. There's no peace without a grateful heart.
I think in the end is we simply need to leave our judgment and assumptions behind, especially in the case of loss, in whatever form that comes in. I just learned thought my line of work to be more open minded. There are conversations going on when someone is terminally Ill that we don’t know about. These 80 year old couple friends, they usually give the blessing somewhere along the line. They seek out these people they trust to care and love for the person they care and love the their whole lives. They keep the memory of their deceased spouses alive. Those who have passed many times tell their loved ones “I’ll be at peace knowing you are with so and so” they honor what they shared special with their deceased loved ones and give permission to allow love for eachother .
I may have never experienced the death of a romantic partner, but I have spoken extensively with those who have in practice. And who are we do judge these experiences?
I can’t even anymore. No one finds this at least a little odd? Or perhaps they are afraid to post what they really think? How does a guy in true tragic form lose his wife, and then take up with one of her best friends within the year - possible within months? Was something going on prior? Am I the only one that finds this healthy if not strange as Fock? Loose your wife, start dating her friend within months and marry her a year after her funeral?
I cannot stop my head from shaking side to side. I guess some guys just cannot be alone.
Until you have been there, and I truly hope anyone here is never faced with that situation, you just don't know.
Understanding the depths of the pain of losing a long time loved one is something that we can all be judgmental about until it happens to us.
Several years ago, I had a cousin that was married for twenty plus years to a woman that passed from Cancer. Within 6 months he had remarried. I remember feeling at that time that there was possibly something before she passed, and I remember feeling judgement toward him for moving along so fast.
Well, that certainly has kicked me in the a$$ lately....
Imagine if you may, being in a relationship with a person that you have chosen to spend your life with, you share everything. You are their sounding board and they are yours. The first person you call when something happens albeit good or bad in your life, the person that comforts you, celebrates you, as you do for them. And to have it ripped apart so soon. Too soon....
It's a pain that you cannot imagine until you have stared it down. The feeling of desperation, loneliness, isolation, the feelings of ending it all so that the pain goes away. Most days deciding whether or not you wanted to live and go on......
What you also don't know, are the conversations that may have been had beforehand between them. I know K talked about who I could be with, and maybe I should think about asking this friend out when she was gone, or I should call this friend of hers for sex if I just needed to get off.....
She also made me promise that I would find someone to be happy with, that could enhance my life in some way like she hoped that she had. Someone to love and share my life with. And that life was too short to be isolated and lonely.
So maybe just be happy and supportive for them, that regardless the circumstances, they have found some sort of happiness from the grief.
One of my quotes that allowed me to be where I am moving through this....
I miss you, yes miss you like a piece of my being has been removed but as life moves on regardless, and I know you would want me to move forward with it
Edward Lee
That grief isn't the same as having your spouse cheat, or want out, or whatever....
There is no detachment phase. You are a devoted, loving caregiver until their last breath of air in the universe as we know it....
There is zero hope that they will ever be back, and the one person that you want to console you is the person that is gone....
So when you can understand that ......then maybe you will understand how a person just wants the pain to end.
I tell my couple friends now, that the best that they can hope for is that they go out together in a fiery auto crash....so that they will never know this.
I hope your friends have found solace and some happiness.
but that’s not always the best idea. So after hearing this very interesting discussion on the radio this morning and then looking further into it, it very much reminded me of comments and discussions made here. And that meant put it in your own thread Don. 
