I'll hold space. Give time. DnJ thanks for the reminder that mars and venus are different. Somehow, I lose sight of this. You and Grok kindly remind me. Something I need to really learn rather than passively hear and forget.
If from your seat, I'm projecting my struggling, I have some relief. I'd prefer to reshape my thoughts and beliefs than to know they're struggling.
Time. I'll watch this one and play it out.

Sent S a couple of videos and pictures from this weekend's bday party we attended. And also thanked him for making the trip. Coming home for a family party is an entire day's event - between traveling and the celebration, it is a time absorber. I really do appreciate him showing up despite the distance. And, I'm thinking through the idea of a letter. Perhaps I start with a funny Hallmark card with a couple words. After all, everyone likes mail (that isn't a bill).

As for D, I'll listen and not fight her need to drop it. I can appreciate the value of saying it out loud.

In the end, S and D are great kids...adults. If I must say so myself, I've done well. These aren't the cards I'd want for them, but it's the hand we've been dealt and so we'll play them.

H's uncle called over the weekend to let me know that FIL had a stroke. He reminded me that I'm family and that he'll keep me updated. FIL is coming to a rehab center close to H and SIL. And, as lucky as I am, they chose the rehab place that the AP works at. That'll be a fun visit. Not sure I'll keep all my thoughts to myself should we happen to run into each other. "Thy will be done."


Uncle: Can't believe I'm the only one taking interest in his arrangements. If it weren't for me, he wouldn't get into any rehab.
M:Oh goodness, glad you're helping him.
Uncle: H and SIL (H's sis) spent 3 hours the hospital the first day and haven't returned to see their own father.
M:That's odd.
Uncle: SIL is going there today. H is going to XX.
M: Oh, sounds like he's headed to his girlfriend's family lake house. (WOAH, did I just tell his family? Man, that wasn't planned. Sounds like I'm done carrying that weight. It really just came out.)
Uncle: Oh, I don't know about anything like that.
M: Well that's good that SIL will be there today. (Gave it no more life.)

Uncle sounded like a hero. MLC of his own? Who knows?

Uncle: Well, I will keep you informed. You are family and we love you very much.
M: Thank you for calling me and I love you too.

Meanwhile, work is busier than ever. Keeps me on my toes. Earned myself a spot bonus and was thrilled with the surprise. I laughed with D that it was spent before it was paid out. The irrigation system is breaking the bank. I need to find myself a new company. And, I'm getting the patio sealed because it's been a few years.

It's been 6 weeks since nephew's grad party where dad wasn't acknowledged by me or kids. Also, 6 weeks since Father's Day that wasn't celebrated. We keep on living a life we didn't sign up for. Learning our way.