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Good! You have to look after yourself. H ain’t going to, he is off running with unicorns and fairies right now.
You can still be kind and cordial; compassionate and caring; all while not being walked all over.
Anger is part of grief. Part of loss. The loss of your marriage, relationship, trust, etc. Find a safe healthy outlet to express your anger/feelings. Go for a run or a walk. Go to the gym and go to town on the punching bag. Dig the garden. Scream into a pillow. It feels better and you won’t blow up at H unexpectedly.
Be strong and keep moving forward. You know: Lighthouse. Best version of you. That inner work.