Originally Posted by Rockon
This week, after not answering several texts that didn’t need a response, I agreed to have a phone conversation with W. She had asked if we could talk on the phone. I updated her on some aspects of S’s health and care, being open and honest. She became upset that I had not told her one of the details about his health earlier and said, “you can’t push me out of our family.” … I didn’t take that bait.

I'm glad you didn't take the bait AND i agree that she might have a reason for being upset about your son's health seeing that he has special needs.

Originally Posted by Rockon
Outcome of our conversation: we have decided to resume weekly phone conversations about S and to use a shared calendar about his appointments. I am reminded that she had told me that only talking to her about S was ridiculous and that whoever had advised me to do that was crazy. Honestly, I don’t want to talk to her at all. However I want to be responsible and to communicate effectively about what is important. I have listened to sage board members here and I’ve stopped looking for reasons to stay in constant contact with her. Suppose that was a 180.

I'm really glad you make this decision for YOU. It doesn't matter how your wife responds or participates in the care... you can go to bed peacefully knowing that you did not allow your anger, hurt or "want to not engage" dictate your actions. You will not be the reason why your wife doesn't show up for your son.

This was a high road choice. One that will have to be made many times. Also one that will not cause no regrets.

Kudos Rock.