It is really amazing how great this community can be, both the historical posts and real time feedback from so many people. When my IC originally recommended that I review MWDs writings, I was skeptical. The books were helpful and challenging to read while going through such a difficult time. Then I found this forum and hired one of the "official" coaches. Steadily it helped me regain my footing. When my W revisited D last year, I felt so much better prepared. Not perfect (and, as you say, folks like Boat, Kind, Valeska, MA, R2C, DnJ, SteveLW, job, and so many others....it really is amazing....all offer generous feedback, even if it can be difficult to read. Keep posting. Keep working to change your old habits. We'll be here to help and many of us are similarly trying to pay it forward.