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Treat your wife like an acquaintance. Smile and be pleasant . Keep everything brief and to the point . One of the hardest challenges is to over come the urge to talk with your spouse about what is happening . Do not engage . It will feel really wrong . She will try to bait you . Right now her bait is sex . Keeping you just close enough . Cut out sex completely. You deserve to sleep with someone who is invested in your marriage not someone planning the great exit .
It’s nice to see catman brought up alcohol and other substances . I hadn’t seen that mentioned when I first posted . But realized quickly not to have a few drinks . The next day it caused utter turmoil for myself emotionally . I would take this suggestion strongly.
Building on the affair topic . There is most likely someone else . They are very good at hiding these affairs whether physical or emotional. They will deny and hide it to the point you think to yourself that you may be crazy for even thinking it . Protect yourself financially. The amount of money they will burn through funding their chaos can be insane .
We all stumble at times during this process . Keep posting . This is a safe space for some good feedback and once in awhile a kick in the right direction .
