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On the stbxw side, i have instructed my lawyer to go the court route. There are marriages worth salvaging but this one isnt one, after all the soul searching i realize the quality of life i would have with someone who so easily, willingly and arrogantly defiled everything that was good, demeaned, belittled, destroyed my character and self esteem and is a completely broken person.
There is nothing wrong with this decision, you need to have a boundary for yourself and it sounds like you have put one in place. DB is about healing yourself and making yourself into the best person that you can be.