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I thought that might be the case. I just don't like the idea that if he's moved on so quickly and the MLC could take years, then it's a long time for me to be lonely hoping he'll come back.
Yep. And that’s why you keep moving forward. Focusing on your life with your kids.
Most of us define ourselves by our marriage. Our relationship. Yet, the biggest and best relationship you have is with yourself. (Re)Discover you.
The LBS has to save themselves first. We must put on our oxygen mask first.
You will find the advice is truly for you. DB truly will save you. And in saving you, gives you your best chance at saving your marriage.
A word on lonely.
Being with someone is just that - with someone. A person in a room full of people can feel utterly alone. A person living by themselves can feel fulfilled and flourish.
Loneliness and being alone (or by self) are not the same thing.
Yes, MLC takes years. That’s a long time. GAL. Get a life. Absolutely necessary. Your life. Not dependent upon H or someone else. Find you. Live and love your life.
Do things. Run, walk, redecorate, rebuild, garden, vacation, etc. Pick up those hobbies you likely set aside during marriage and kids. Learn new skills. Take music lessons. Learn an instruments. Or play the one you know.
I truly mean you have the gift of time. Use it wisely.
Originally Posted by MistyDD
H is due to be moving out in a month or so. I could cut the new guy off but then I'm scared that maybe he's been sent to me for a reason. Obviously there's the option to keep the new guy secret too whilst I see how it pans out.
Secrets won’t become you. Live in the light.
It obvious H is a mess. Do not get drawn into his mess. Let go. Let him move out.
Doing nothing is doing something. Embrace limbo. Embracing, choosing, gives you the power. You choose limbo only on the romantic facet of your life.
You can only control three things in this world. Your thoughts, your actions, and your reactions. And with what you control (do/think) you affect/influence all other aspects of your life.
Originally Posted by MistyDD
H won't see the OW again till May as she's abroad. I'm not sure if he's clinging on to stay at home as long as possible whilst she isn't here.
Likely. People often don’t let go of their current branch before they have a really good hold onto the next. And he is confused, living in two worlds.
