Mia,

Please just let him go for a while. Trying to get him back on board does nothing but cause you heartache and it is evident that he is not a happy camper right now. Are you sure that there is not a third person in your marriage? When we attempt to bring them back into the family, they hear our voices, our pleading and begging and in some cases see all of the pain that they have caused in our eyes and in the tone of our voices and that "guilts" them back into the marriage. You don't want to guilt him to return. You want him to return because he wants to come back and be with his family.

For now, if you haven't already done it, set up your own bank accounts and credit cards. Find ways to keep yourself busy and do not ask him to return home. Give him all of the time and space that he needs. He can't miss you if you are chasing after him. Until he can figure things out for himself, he is going to continue to throw things up in your face and use those excuses, which are called projections by the way, to leave.

Again, let him go, allow God to take care of him. Now is the time for you to focus on you, your life, and the children. Focus on what you can do to help you each and every day. You may want to consider some counseling for yourself. Right now, it is not a good idea to ask him to go because he may very well just say what he thinks all of you want to hear.

I know that this is a difficult time for you, but you have to move forward and do what is best for you and the children. The holiday season is upon us and it's going to be difficult. Any conversations that you have with him should be about finances and the children. No relationship talks! Keep the conversations short, polite and simple.

Again, lots of time and space is what he needs. Dig deeper for patience because this is not a sprint but a marathon. Come back here as often as you need to. Many of us have been right where you are today during the holiday season.