This is totally normal.

What sort of human being would you be, if you were married to this person, had kids together, but didn’t think about what used to be from time to time?

It’s okay, even when you’ve happily moved on, to have a rubbish day here and there.

I am completely emotionally detached from my wretched ex. If she ever tried to come back, I’d laugh in her face and run like Forrest Gump in the opposite direction…. But last week, one of my kids did say to me that they found themself thinking about what life would be like if we were still together. That affected me quite a lot, not because I’d ever go back or want to be with her, but because it reminded me of the effect that divorce has on children - and that made me sad for a day or two.

You’re never going to be 100%. The real measure of progress is simply that those difficult times slowly become much shorter, and less frequent. You might find yourself thinking about him for a day, once a week. And then next year you might find it’s only half a day every month, and so on….

It will never go away. Being married and having kids together was a huge part of your life. Just acknowledge it, don’t run from it, and know that there isn’t a person on this board who wouldn’t feel a bit sad from time to time 👍