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I think in the end is we simply need to leave our judgment and assumptions behind, especially in the case of loss, in whatever form that comes in. I just learned thought my line of work to be more open minded. There are conversations going on when someone is terminally Ill that we don’t know about. These 80 year old couple friends, they usually give the blessing somewhere along the line. They seek out these people they trust to care and love for the person they care and love the their whole lives. They keep the memory of their deceased spouses alive. Those who have passed many times tell their loved ones “I’ll be at peace knowing you are with so and so” they honor what they shared special with their deceased loved ones and give permission to allow love for eachother .
I may have never experienced the death of a romantic partner, but I have spoken extensively with those who have in practice. And who are we do judge these experiences?