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(Btw I wasn't suggesting you reconcile - the odds of real change on his part at this point are very slim. But by having a clear picture in your head of what REAL change would look like - living apart for at least a year, him in intensive therapy and a 12 step program for both his drinking and his sex addiction, complete transparency - you can recognize the inadequacy of any half-hearted attempts on his part to get back to his comfortable life.)