Front what I can understand from her, it’s the past when I was so distant and emotionally available that she struggles with and can’t seem to get past and has been causing he mental health to be so bad and she can’t get pass it. The last 5 years she I couldn’t have taken better care of her and no one could have did a better job. I have been the best in the past 5 years it has nothing to do with the last 5 years . She says I just can’t seem to make myself whole again after all the pain from those previous years where I wasn’t really available for her.
Dink, there is a famous line from the Bon Jovi song "I'll Be There For You". It goes, "I can promise you tomorrow, but I can't buy back yesterday." There is absolutely no way you can no anything about the past. What I don't understand is why you're continuing to have these discussions with her. Remember, the first rule is DBing is never start relationship talks. And if she does you listen and validate, and be the one to end the conversation. "I have things I need to go do." Then walk away.
I've never heard of a LBS discussing their way out of their WAS wanting a divorce.
I've asked before, have you read Divorce Remedy or Divorce Busting? You are going to have to change your dynamic with her to have a chance at turning this around. But please stop discussing things with her. She keeps saying she can't get over the past, she certainly isn't going to if you keep discussing it with her.
