Yesterday was a good day, Mom, Dad and my Aunt came over to take care fo me. We all talked about H and what has been going on.
I realized yesterday how hard this is on my Dad, he really loved and respected my H, as we talked I could feel and see his disappointment, anger, confusion and sadness. He does not understand what H is going through or why H would not lean on the family to get through his issues. It really is like a death, the man we all knew and loved is gone. Its the whys, why blow up a life you worked so hard to build? Why turn your back on everyone and all the love and support that H got from me and the whole family?
Same questions I go over in my head ever day. I know the OW is just a symptom, I get that. But I don't understand the justifications in his head. We were a respected couple, good people, lots of friends. H knows he can trust me with his life and that I would never hurt him, at least he use to know that. The OW is a known cheater, multiple affairs, she is not a good person, his friends have no respect for her or what he is doing. One of H's friends has told me on 2 occasions that he had the pleasure(sarcasim) of being around them, that she will just ignore him, no eye contact, does not acknowlege him at all. I would imagine there are alot of our friends that she treats like that, friends of the marriage. I mean, H has got to see this right? Do you think any of that stirs logical thought? Or does he just think that will pass with time? And the OW, she is obviously uncomfortable around H & I's mutual friends.?? Random thoughts this morning.
Anyway I talked with my folks about MLC and what I have learned on this site. MOne of my brothers went through a MLC 5 ish years ago. He divorced his wife of 20 years to go live with the OW. He regrets it every day., still with the OW , he feels stuck nowt . Does not love herr at all. They bought a house togetther, never married, sleep in seperate beds, doesn't souund like happy fantasy lland does it...I have talked to him about H and what I am going through quit a bit. He gets very upset talking to me, brings back all of the pain he caused his XW. He would do anything to take it all back. So good news, my brother woke up about 2 months after he left his wife, but the damage done my Xsil would not forgive.
