Tomorrow, in my meeting with Alien over taxes (ugh, I would rather be talking about death!!)....when I look at him and we chat, I will be thinking in my mind...."you are the homeless man living on the grill"....
Bethie, excellent point as well. I think this is the turning point for me, as I have increased contact with alien. I sit here and mentally run down anything I could have done wrong to defend myself against anger. When in reality the anger comes from guilt that is righteous.
And, I thought....you tore down a path of insanity, doing horrible things to me and our M, and I am SCARED OF YOU? No. Not a chance.
Hmmmm, I might have to go buy index cards tonight.
MAD, oh I'm mad alright but not at you. I just get so tired and angry that such good people are put in this position. How many times have you read someones post and immediately you feel connected and involved because you can see what's in their heart. Shouldn't this be a no-brainer for the person who has shared a life with them. I was once told and now I firmly believe that we remind our spouses of the strength and integrity that they feel they are missing. Kind of ironic that these walkaways would go out and purposely do things to fulfill their destiny.
Don't over think this, you're doing just fine!
Love, Bethie
Whine?? Ah I don't think so. Your talking to the Queen of the whiners!
You go girl! You have done nothing to deserve this. I'm so glad that you understand this, besides, he's probably more afraid of you then you could ever be of him, and for good reason, he knows exactly what he did!
J, Always good to hear your take on things. Hope things are going well for you and that you're still laughing!
I have made some personal adjustments in myself that I am very proud of. I was sometimes taken in by being petty, about some things. H used to really push my buttons, and I was angrily stomping around the house. I was also left to do much of the discipline with the girls. Now that part of my life is gone. I am so much more patient and kind. I teach Kindergarten, and I truly am an understanding teacher, and work with kids and their parents, not trying to be fair, but do what is right for each child. So this crisis has been good for me to. I will always have that. But I still whine alot! I wine too! Gotta take a few swings on the pole. Cheers, HOlly
Bomb 1/06 D dismissed 11/07, attempt reconciliation. Premature. Divorce final October 31, 2008. OW looks like bad history. Over. Still hopeful. Baby steps. In R with my X.
Holly, Checking in. I haven't been keeping up with as many sitches as I would like. Your post above spoke to me. I was the same way. I used to get worked up about little things... stupid things. But now, since this mess has struck my life, I have it all in perspective. I have so much more patience.
YOu are such a gentil, kind, warm, beautiful person. If you didn't give off those vibes before your M hit hard times, you sure do now!
Married 9 years Kids 5 and 6 Bomb 2006 H back and forth for a year M now back on track
Send me an email at wakupmaggiataoldotcom, please.
Everything happens for a reason, maybe Dad needs to find that it isn't better out there, he needs to realize how good he had it here. Maybe he will find God and that is the most important thing when he finds Him he will know he is supposed to come home.
For some reason, I didn't get it. I had the same problem with Holly and PlentyHope. It doesn't really matter. I was just a little miffed that your thread from earlier today had been closed. I am a little disappointed in the peevish way your topic was treated. I was actually really excited to see this topic and hoped I would learn more to help me in my own situation.
I hope I don't start something again but I just felt the need to be heard. I had a long post written but discovered I couldn't post it. It said I didn't have access.
I just want you to know how much I appreciate everything you post to me and others. I am feeling a little sad today but I will post the story on my own thread.
Everything happens for a reason, maybe Dad needs to find that it isn't better out there, he needs to realize how good he had it here. Maybe he will find God and that is the most important thing when he finds Him he will know he is supposed to come home.
I had a long day at school. I am on a committee (IAT) that meets all day with parents and teachers, in a hot little room. I came home early, and on the way TJ called. No, not THE call. It was a little strange. And yes, I evaluate every little neuance and I always will.
He started out the convo very friendly, and wanted to know about the last e-mail he sent me, because sometimes , legitamately I do not get them. I answered. I promised BND. Well, I just did not answer it, but I claimed to"forget". He was forwarding a ? from the tax guys, business. Well, I just haven't found the document yet, ( I did this morning) so I told him I would get it to the tzx guys this am. I will. I was going home to find it right then and there. (I really was). I ask about his Dad, and I did a good job of listening. Then he began to end the phone call, and he said something weird, Drive safe and have a good trip,,,(he mumbled and stumbled a bit.) We said goodbye. On my part it was a little reluctant. His tone was a bit sing songie pitch, I like that. He seemed to be in a hurry to get off the phone. But he did call. He usually e mails or text messages. There was a weird beeping sound through out our conversation. A gas pump? Airport? Was the trip reference about my upcoming trip that I have not mentioned to him? I wonder,,,,,
Houston, we have contact.
Not what I wanted, but have to be content with the little things.
Last night I was SOOOO tired. I went to sleep at 7:30 8:00 pm,. and got up at 5:30 this morning. I guess I was tired. Today I teach for 1/2 a day, and then have a counselor appointment. I will be gone until April 15th. Sun and a little fun! Then a D hearing. Yikes!!!!! I will try and get online from down there. Somehow. Call me, OK? I need to keep in touch. Love, Holly
Bomb 1/06 D dismissed 11/07, attempt reconciliation. Premature. Divorce final October 31, 2008. OW looks like bad history. Over. Still hopeful. Baby steps. In R with my X.
