HM and Holly, I don't post often but I do read and follow threads. I have to say that I totally agree with Happy. DB'ing isn't about playing games or being mysterious or any of that. It is about finding and becoming ourselves. Who cares what your H thinks about your vacation. You shouldn't. Go and enjoy yourself because it is something that you want to do. Be happy because happy people are attractive. Mysterious people are only attractive until you find out what they were hiding and then they lose their appeal.
GAL is not about putting on a show that will hopefully attract our spouses back it is about learning who we are again (or maybe for the first time). It is about developing ourselves and becoming a whole independent person again. It is about looking inside and finding our own weaknesses and problems and overcoming them. It is about learning to be happy because we have looked inside and learned that happiness comes from within not from without.
Holly, if you wonder if your H is going to lie to you about the taxes then assume he is. Educate yourself about them and decide what you should get. Don't leave it up to him and then complain when he isn't honest.
HM, even Michelle points out that MLC is a whole different ball of wax than run of the mill marriage problems. Showing kindness to them does work wonders as far as making this bearable but you have to understand that they are often like a cornered animal who will lash out at anyone or anything that gets too close. I really believe that even the OP is kept at distance. MLCer's never really let anyone see what is happening inside of them. GAL is for you. Being nice is for you and others just happen to benefit from it. Stop worrying about what your h is or isn't thinking. Be nice to him not because it is good for him but because it is good for you. If you are nice then it makes it so much harder for him to be nasty.
ST
At the bar the Judge will not look us over for medals, degrees, or diplomas, but for scars. - Hugh B. Brown
