EA turned PA, Wife on the fence

[2stardog]

I've given up on begging and pleading. I do tell her I believe we can make our union better than ever with properly applied effort. I have a hard time not telling her I love her. I spent a long time not expressing that fact. I have a compulsive desire to hold and kiss her. Sometimes it's received well, others not. I do need to GAL I suppose. This has become all encompassing to me. It was getting easier and probably wouldv'e been more barerable if the "clues" re: the OM were not permeating. Now that I know the line was crossed, I have no desire to keep tabs on her. In that way my ivestigations and their results have been helpful. I told her what needs to happen for us to continue....We're meeting for a late lunch tomorrow to discuss what she's thinking/feeling. I'm prepared for the worst. So although a bit anxious I'm ready to be non-chalant, DB style on her if I don't like what she has to say. I want her to be happy, But I will not let her have her cake and eat it too....For example: I will not watch our kids as she goes out w/ the OM. Which I know was attempted before the confrontation last week. That put a squash on those dinner plans... Wish me luck, my friends in misery.....