Life goes on, and it ain't about Job

[81388*]

YW and Emtn;
Thank you for your posts. I can assure you that if you look back through the last several threads, the strength comes and goes. I think it the same for most of us. When it first begins we are consumed with fear. The fear of change,uncertainty,loss of love. We are also hurt by the betrayal and trapped in an emotional undertow. Those of us that are fortunate enough to find resources such as DR/DB, don't spend as much time in that evil place and quickly choose to be different people.

The choice is made at first because we want to stop our spouses from doing what they are doing, but gradually we come to realize that the change is really for us. We choose to become strong, happy, joyful, and giving. As we make that choice we start to see our lives as individuals and that although it won't be what we thought it would be, our lives can still be wonderful even without the person we had once wanted in it more then anything else.

The weekend was great! Stayed up too late, drank too much beer, played the music too loud, and slept more and better then I have since this started. I other words, I had my own mini MLC. The big difference is that at the end of the weekend, I could look back at the 3 days and say that it was fun, but I had no desire to live there. Just like college, I can remember it fondly, but wouldn't want to have to do it again.

Yes there are things in my life that need to change, but that can be done without sacrificing the rest of my family. Maybe at some point my wife will see that the same is true for her.