I agree with neli. Don't push the D if you don't want it (but don't try to block it either). This will be the strongest statement that you don't want the D (and more impressive than any words). I do think you need to seriously consider making concrete plans to "come home" and then conveying them to your W. Filing for D is not the end (and it doesn't always mean the D is inevitable) so I think it might be too soon to give up and think coming back is of no value.
There are some positive signs so I think you still have something to work for/with. It's late enough that I don't have time for full comment now. I'll try to respond with more detail in a couple days.
