Just when you think they don't care, they prove you wrong.
Came down with a nasty stomach virus early Sun AM, I sent exW a text asking her if she would take D10 to church if she was going. She replied if she goes it won't be until the 11:30am mass (it was 7am when I text'd her) she told me to go back to sleep and feel better she will call when she is on her way over. She calls me shortly before 11am and said she will keep our D all day so I can rest and doesn't want her to get sick. I was so glad she did this because I was in bed or on the coach all day.
Now around 9pm I am talking to a female friend of mine who knows my stich and I was just saying how upset I was that exW hasn't called or text to see how I was doing. Well lo and behold two minutes later I get a text...Hey, just ckg on you. r u feeling better. I text her back thanking her for checking on me and said I feeling a tad bit better and I was going to try and get a full night sleep. She sent another text saying...ok, sweet dreams. talk to u tomoro.
Wow, I was really touched.
I get another text at 10:30am this AM from her...Hi r u feeling better 2day?
She keeps telling me how she can't give me what I need in a relationship right now, but in her own way I do beleive she is trying.
On another note her profile hasn't gone back up on Match yet.
Do not be smothering but keep the word gentle in mind.
Help me out with defining smothering. Is calling or texting her everyday to see how see is smothering? Is making plans a few days in advance smothering?
All this stuff she doesn't seem to mind, everytime I mention getting together she never gives me a hard time.
Should I just go dark for awhile and have her intiate all contact?
Her LL is quality time, one of the reasons she left is because she felt I did not make her a priority. I almost feel if I don't stay on top of her she will think I am not interested.
I have been going out of my way to make her feel appreciated. I even think she is going stupid little things that make me feel like she is thinking of me. Like I asked her to bring me palm back from church on Sunday, well I dropped off my D10 last night and she gave me some palm which she made into a cross along with the chruch bulletin. Sounds silly but I thought that was very thoughtful, almost a 180 for her.
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No, do not go dark, she likes the attention, but you can still make her work for it.
Not being available all of the time. I am not one for head games, so do not do that but there are times you can let the calls go to voice mail. You can do little things and make some plans for yourself. I know you would rather be with your wife but it is important you fight the urge to jump each time you hear her voice.
Hope you said Thank you for the palm. Yes that was very kind of her.
There can be no testimony without a test. I am praying to go through this test and come out the other end with a new and better marriage then before.
Hope you said Thank you for the palm. Yes that was very kind of her.
Yes I sent her a text this morning thanking her. She just sent me a text back saying it wasn't her best work and letting me know that my D10 has been really getting on her nerves. I sug that she let her parents watch her for a few hours Fri nite and we can go out for drinks so she can de-stress. She replied she will ask her dad to color easter eggs with her.
BND Thank you for your common sense comments. They have given a much clearer understanding about what needs to be done.
Just a curious question....does it seem odd that she can communicate better texting than actually calling me? I hate texting as I think it is impersonal, but she will say stuff in a text which she can not say verbally.
