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SA3 #994972 03/30/07 04:14 PM
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For some MLCers they try to keep the OW around as a second option.

I personally don't sense that in this case...but it could be.

MLCers have a Knight in Shining Armour Complex, and OW's are commonly distressed.

SA4...you've been at this so very long with so much cycling...it has seemed through most of the years. What do you think?

Is the OW someone who is needy and broken...the prime sort that a fixer wants to help?

Could be either. Just stay strong...and I know you will.

HUGS,
RCR

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RCR has made some excellent points.

I think OW are the needy, clingy types who trap them with their pity talk and vice versa.

Commonly distressed--you bet.


The Bomb: 08/05
H moves out: 06/2006
H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07
H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08
H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09
Divorced 08-12
Kids: 22, 20, 19
SA3 #994986 03/30/07 04:19 PM
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I can't believe it.

I can't believe he still talks to her.
(SIGH)

HUGS to you mamma.


“Pray as though everything depended on God. Work as though everything depended on you.”
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SA4,

Thank you for the update. Hope, what does that smell like?

Just keep doing what you're doing. You've just discovered another bump in the road but after 4 years that should be no surprise, right? As long as this cr_p doesn't screw around w/ your Life Already in Progress, so what.

-- Karen

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ow's are predators...nothing less......they use their charm...set themselves up to be rescued..they know just what to say to boost the MLC-ers tattered ego.....for all their cleverness look at the only type of man they can attract...a married MLCer. Yup pondscum,


Me 53
H 51
OW 25
Bomb may 06
left june 8/ 06
ILYBNILWY (twice!)
7/6/07 H wants to come home
7/21/07 H comes home
7/07 -7/08 long haul letting go of OW
now piecing in earnest

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SA4

You are such an inspiration. You just kept moving forward with your life and now you are in such a great place whether your h comes out of this or not.

I do think you still have feelings for your h but you have buried them. They are in a safe place and if he says and does the right things then you can let those feelings come back. If not then they are in a safe place where your good memories are.

It must be so frustrating that he is still talking to ow. But remember they are an addiction that the mlcer has a hard time breaking. No comfort I know.

I do think your h will come through this but he is baking really really slowly.

In the meantime you sound so good and I am sure your children are thriving because of what a great mom you are.

Mermaid

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Hello everyone-

RCR- yes OW needs to be saved, mostly from herself. I can't beleive someone can go through life and make sooooooo many bad mistakes. She seems to drift from one unavailable man to the next. Best I can tell, is that she has broken up more than one marriage, only to be alone again. You would think these people would learn from their mistakes.

Mermaid- We sure have been at this a long time.

Life is good, no it is actually great. My new house is so wonderful. It is so nice to have gotten out of that big house with all the bad memories.

I am so busy this time of year, with work, reffing, and coaching that I barely have time to sit down. H calls several times a day and sometimes I am just too busy to pick up.

OW's most recent contact was cyclical with her patterns......I got so fed up I just told H that it was time for D. He panicked, and finally after 4 years decided to change his cell phone!! It is her lifeline to him...... To my knowledge she no longer knows where he works, and his mother had forbidden her to call, so the cell was the mode of communication...

He spent Easter with us, lots of familya activities, and is constantly talking about "us", "our", "we"......

I'm still closely guarded and still do my own thing...

We are bracing here for a big storm (so much for spring)....

Have a great weekend everyone-
SA4

SA3 #1012996 04/13/07 08:46 PM
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SA4

Good to hear from you. You do sound busy but you sound like you are enjoying life. I know it has been a long time in coming for both of us.

It is cold and rainy here so I know what you mean about the lack of spring weather. We just got back from Disneyland and some nice sunshine. I am praying for a nice summer.

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