Valentines day massacre

[outtaluck]

Only do it if you want to. She doesn't get to decide. You do. Set your boundaries and only do what you feel comfortable doing.

Thanks for this!! Absolutly right you are... As it turns out he never called anyway, so I'm off the hook for now. I'll tell him when the time is right, but I'm not going out of my way to...


Yesterday did good with the PMA, got alot of things done that I've been putting off. Today not so much... Lot of emotions coming up that I thought I was done with...lot of crying for some reason...even as I'm crying I'm saying to myself "what the heck am I crying about?" ( don't worry...not in front of her...only when she's out the house ) Don't know where this crap is coming from...well I do, but I thought I was dealing better with it all...aparently not. Jeez, its like enough already... can't take it...she doesn't even deserve these tears

I know I miss her. I look at her and think "damn, she looks soooo good!!" I know I need to detach more....I know more of GAL ... How do you do that when your heart still melts for her the same as it has for 20 years? All she has to do is walk in the room and I'm putty in her hands...God, I hate myself for being so weak...

She's made it easy...she's never around really...and when she is I might as well be a ghost...not like I'm getting mixed messages...must be the optimist in me clinging to hope...even thought the rational part knows there is none at this time.


Anyway...sorry...I know its just a bad day...it'll pass... Just wanted to get this out of my head...thinking it would help somehow...

I need a drink or 20