DR says A lasts 6 months. True???

[still hoping]

Hi lonely,
You are a brave woman to still be living with your H! Read a little of your first thread. Something my H said to me after he left was that he didn't want to get back together because he couldn't promise that it wouldn't happen again in the future and he couldn't do that to me again. (Ha, funny - I haven't thought about that since he told me 8 months ago). Since then, he really hasn't said anything nice, but we also really have not had any talk about our R. I say now that if he ever did come back, I would not stand for him doing this to me again. But then again, I used to always say if he ever cheated on me, I'd be finished with him. Guess I've learned to never say never!

Are you waiting for the A to die out? I guess I am, but seems to me my H is a little slower than most, so I definitely am expecting to have to wait longer than 6 months. And of course, the sitch has to be complicated - previous EA with this OW lasted about 6 months, then I think she was away for 6 months, but now I think she's back and he's living with her/having a PA. Which date do I calculate from??? Maybe it never died and he really does love her and wants to be with her???

The only person I can really talk to about the A is a friend who has lived through it. Like you, my friends (even his sister!) think I'm crazy too and should leave him, which is exactly what I would say if wasn't going through this. When I tell friends now that we're separated, I sometimes don't even mention the A. Or I play it down, saying it's not the reason why we're separated (but this part is really what I believe).