Both of you have given up all power to your Ws. Then you complain because you don’t like the arrangement your Ws have made, so you want to change it. But neither of you want to be responsible for making those changes, you both want your Ws to do that for you, plus do it happily so that neither of you have to feel guilty about forcing anything! You want all the benefit without any of the cost.
Then you both have the gall to sidestep any responsibility for even attempting these changes by hiding behind the excuse that you are concerned about your Ws feelings, that you don’t want to force them, that you don’t want to D for their sake, blah, blah, blah. The fact of the matter is that you are only concerned about YOU. You can fool yourself all you want with this veil of being a loyal sympathetic H, but your Ws don’t buy that, nor is it what they want. You both put your Ws in the worst possible position – making them responsible for your faults but trying to keep the “glory” of rescuing the relationship to yourself. That is a lose-lose situation for your Ws and it is no wonder they have no interest in giving you sex.
If you’re scared to assert yourself, then say so to your Ws. That way they can adjust and at least get credit for being the ones working to save the M, not you. Stop making them responsible for your lack of backbone.
CeMar,
Oral sex is BASIC sex to me.
How can this be basic to you? When was the last time you received oral sex?
There is an incredibly strong EMOTIONAL element in BJ's, BJ's take the relationship to different and HIHGER level.
When was the last time this happened? Or is this just what you IMAGINE it to be? Are you just living in a fantasy world, from watching too much porn? Are you wanting your W to transform into those girls on the internet and your real complaint is that she won’t do that? Your comments are starting to sound like you are very detached from reality.
