Well, the D process has begun. We have not met with a mediator yet, but are working out some things on our own, like custody/visitation. I also need to get together a budget and get the house appraised. We will probably see the mediator in the next couple of weeks to get started.
I was terrified of all this, but it's actually not so bad. We've been doing the kid stuff for the past 19 months anyway, so it's just a matter of formalizing it.
The budget is a lot of work, though, and I'm marking midterms now, so it's not the best timing. Anyway, it has to be done. I think that, like many things, this will turn out to be not as bad as my fears. The fear of the unknown is often so much worse for me.
As sad as I am that it has come to this, it really is for the best, at least right now. We will get this done, I will heal, and then...who knows? I would like to be married again, but I will wait for God to bring me someone at the right time. And if it's my H, so much the better. But realistically, that's unlikely and I need to move on at this point.
I am going back to see the T I was seeing a year ago, the one I stopped seeing b/c he said H was a narcissist!!! Maybe he was not so wrong. Actually, it doesn't really matter. I have to get past my need for answers and desire for H's approval.
So that's my story for now.
Love to all of you, and thanks again for your wonderful support.
Nicola
Life isn't about finding yourself; it's about creating yourself My thread: Trusting God's Plan
