This morning I started thinking about H as I was driving back from dropping the kids at school and immediately I said, "No, this is not for me to solve, I've turned it over to God, thank you, God." and that was it. A feeling of lightness came over me and my mind went on to think of more pleasant things.
I'm not even checking to see how God is doing. It doesn't even sound right to "check on God's work" when you hear it but, I know I'm always looking to see if God is working on it. This would be enough to make any human give up. But, God loves me and understands my impatience. But, I love God so I will not continue to be unloving by looking over His shoulder, so to speak.
Letting Go is always a good idea. I forgot that when I had something to "work" on.
I know my H needs lots of space, still . I do get tired and impatient, I know but, this is not in my time and I know I am perfectly welcome to give up at any time. I will know that I have done everything I can (well that's the point, isn't it?)to save my marriage, to make it satisfying. But, I have not trusted God by continuing to let go.
This is a lesson to learn many times over. Each time I get better and better at it.
