Heck, I've been reconciled for 4 years and I still have those feelings some days!
I don't know about your sitch, but in my case, I think there are two factors involved.
The first factor is fear. Even when things are going well, there's that fear that it could happen again - and that if you let yourself get too close, too vulnerable, you could get hurt. This seems to be why it pops up after good times, like vacation - you get close, then you get scared.
The second factor has to do with imagination. Maybe I'm a dull girl, but in the first 18 years of my marriage, I never imagined divorce. I just assumed we would always be together, I loved my H and didn't imagine other men or other lives at all.
But once my H's affair FORCED me to think about alternate futures - well, the genie's kinda out of the bottle, you know? I've imagined now where I would live if we split, I've run the financial numbers in my head, I've thought of things I would do if I were single. And every once in a while, when I've had a bad day or when H is being a poopyhead, I imagine that alternate future. And although I don't flirt, now when I meet attractive men, the thought crosses my mind that if I were single, I could see going out with a guy like that.
Maybe I'm unusual, maybe most people think those things throughout their marriage, but I NEVER did until after H's affair.
