Yes, ouch is right! Betrayal is a horrible wound indeed. 8, I must ask you why you would want to contact others to confirm your W's previous A's? What will that do for your life to make it better? I cannot see any good coming of it. It will just fuel more anger and hurt for you. Is that going to move you forward? As far as your W's engagement plans, I think Theo is right she's NUTS! Anyone who would leave their M and family of 18 years and get engaged a few weeks later is not playing with a full deck right now. She is trying to legitimize what she has done. If the OM wasn't her "dream guy" then how could she possibly legitimize the pain she is causing herself and her family? It's part of the fantasy, she's trying to ease her guilt. Sadly, youmust let her live out her mistakes. That is hard. Try to maintain as positive a R with her as you can right now, that's best for your sitch and your family. I'd still try and push her to take some responsibility for the kids and allow you some outing time. I'd stick with trying to achieve that. Take care 8, and yes, you are one hell of a good man!
