Still Alive, V

[fearless]

Don't misunderstand me. I would never ask that you believe any differently or try to act likable. That is the hardest part to explain in my personal belief. I think it is important to empathize and be understanding without ever apologizing when you do not mean it.

Actually, regaining my self-integrity is my main goal.

OK. Then this helps me understand what you did. Last night was an exercise for you to feel like you could bring up your POV knowing that she would be upset and argue with you and to argue it without backing down. Pretty good job then. FWIW, in that case instead of using your last line before walking up to bed, I would have said, "that's your choice. This is who I am." Because your last line then deflected from the main point of holding your ground on the objectification/appreciation issue and MsHD's comment by inserting the making love issue which deflects from the issue of maintaining strength on your viewpoint.

So the making love issue is more of a side issue and you can wait for that to develop after you feel you have your integrity and self-esteem back.

You do realize that self esteem and integrity come from you completely and MsHD is a minor player in this issue, right?

This goal makes much more sense with your actions. There has been so much focus on the making love issue that it seemed to me that it was driving your behavior. And I was getting lost in all the responses.