This my friend is what we call a breakthrough crisis. This is the low point of this part of your personal pain. It's very normal to have a breakdown immediately after you have a break through.

OK - I'm going to use an analogy here about healing. You know when you use a roasting pan and it gets all the baked on grit on it - there's fat and burned meat and baked on pumpkin and potato? To clean it, you put it in water with detergent yeah? You know when you start to clean it the water gets all dirty and it's a complete mess. Sometimes you actually have to get fresh water to finish cleaning it. That's what happens with us too.

You are starting to reflect on and clean up years of baked on beliefs and values and it makes the water dirty to start with. You are at the stage where you have to finish getting the crap off before it's worthwhile changing the water.

I'll post this because I've got a longer post to finish back to you, but while you are surfing the net, if you are not sleeping, google stuff about "Cosmic Ordering", Sacred Contracts, manifesting miracles, I think you'll enjoy reading about those concepts

Remember Winston Churchill said
Quote:
"If you’re going through hell, keep going!"
that's what you've got to do right now. Keep putting one foot in front of the other and keep right on going.

V

Never make someone a priority, who makes you an option.