My heart dropped a little tonight. I know I should not "snoop" but when I am out and about I do drive by where my H generally spends him time. He wasn't there. While this is not TOTALLY unusal it does make me raise a flag.
I know he has dated in the past and I know he will in the future. I guess I just got comfortable with him not dating these past couple of months. And I know it will happen, and that it probably HAS to happen for him to realize what he is missing in me and how wonderful I really am. BUt it is still hard to think about your XH/H cuddled up holding someone else. Or god forbid sleeping with someone else. Or being tender loving and caring to someone else.
That is what gets me. That is what I wanted loved and craved from him. Those were the nights that I lived for. And while I have seen him grow in the past 6 months I also know my XH. And while the first 3 montsh with him can be great and wonderful he can't sustain that level of attention on the other person. He wants that other person to be there for him. He wants to have attention and affection lavished on him on his time frame. And I know "most" women in this world expect more. Most women and more of a "prima donna" than me. Most women want to be taken care of and snuggled with and wonderful things done for them. And as much as I love my husband and would take him back in a heartbeat. That isn't my XH. He is much more of a taker. ANd really I don't think ANY amount of time will really change that.
If he is dating someone, may this be a quick phase where he realizes that the "grass isn't greener" and that he gave up/pushed away something that is WONDERFUL!.
I keep trying to put a postive light on this because if I don't I will crumble into a pile of mush. I just have to think that this HAS to be part of the process. That he needs to see the other side of the coin.
So God, if you are listening, please try to help my XH through this phase quickly to get him moving back toward me please!
