I must have missed the part where things took a turn for the worse again - what happened? Why do feel like the S will hit the F? I get the feeling you've gone into silent rumination mode having established some communication that was half working. I think what she is feeling peeved about is that you've gone quiet on her? Could that be right.
Quote:
But MrsHD likes the silence. It is safe for her. From her current position, she has everything to lose and nothing to gain by allowing relationship to move off center.
I disagree
I don't think she likes the silence. Silence is an abandonment issue. We've established she has big-time abandonment issues. Speaking as someone with QT as her LL (and I believe MsHD is the same - something about a convo with her BIL about what's her favourite vegetable - remember that?) and speaking as someone with her own abandonment issues, I can tell you silence absolutely is not what is comfortable for her. She LIKES the pit. She's a lawyer, she likes the cut and thrust of a heated argument not just for the feeling of power when she wins but because it involves total engagement. When HD gets in the pit with MrsHD she has his full attention. And she loves it. Maybe she feels like the only way she can get his full attention is by doing this?
Mrs Cac talked about this on Cemar's thread what made her start desiring her H was when he started TALKING to her, talking to her without the TV on, talking directly to her without being sarcastic. HD we love your humour, truly we do, but sometimes humour can be a defence. Why would MsHD lower her defences if she never feels like you lower yours?
Fran
if we can be sufficient to ourselves, we need fear no entangling webs Erica Jong
