But MrsHD likes the silence. It is safe for her. From her current position, she has everything to lose and nothing to gain by allowing relationship to move off center. That is why Nop is right in telling HD to rattle the cage one way or another. It is all meant to get to Step 6 of Nop’s outline. I am only suggesting that it is particularly import how HD rattles the cage.
Well then we agree. I'm saying essentially the same thing. Rattle the cage. I guess we differ on the likelyhood of success if he rattles the cage by saying "oh" and the like. But you are confusing me on that issue because in one sentence you say basically that is effective and the next sentence is that MrsHD likes the silence, so... Which is it? How is he possibly going to make progress without forcing her to change her stance? She is in the driver's seat. There is no way in heck she is going to give that up until he forces her out of the car.
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Raising the ante to keep steady pressure on her is a way of forcing her to take a different perspective, yet staying just clear of her confrontational tactics that she uses to avoid confrontation of her own issues, KWIM?
No. It's tit for tat and not going to work. I know you believe that it will and I see you describe it all the time in your own M on this board, but I doubt it would ever get HD to the loving M that he wants. That's just my take. LFL
