Amy, not only the new folks benefit, but some of us "old timers" do also. Perhaps my x will also "wake up", and I'll be better prepared in part thanks to your posts. On the other hand, perhaps she never will and that's why its important for folks to look after themselves and move along. For the new folks, yes, you can do both. Important to note, some few never do "wake up" and remain stuck. Thanks again Amy.
GB, If I might chime in here, having spent some time in MLC myself and now witnessing my H going through, I think that I can safely agree with Amy.
PRIDE is a huge factor, it almost goes against human nature not just to admit that you are wrong but to come back AND ask for forgiveness. The thought is overwhelming. Add to it an MLCer's in bred insecurities and lack of direction and well, you got a big pot of mess brewing. It is much easier to run and hide with someone new than to face your demons, lies, and move on. I think that they also suffer from a tremendous amount of guilt, almost paralyzingly so. They really are lost and when the fog lifts, the guilt is just too much. So much time has passed that nothing is really as they can try to remember it to be.
I guess with regard to your W specifically, if she is amongst those that does wake up and you are still standing she will be lucky.
