So what prompted all of these revelations? Seven years is a pretty long time to hold all that stuff inside. But like Nop said, you cannot change the past, only how you think about the past and even more important, the present and future. At least you are being honest with each other. Focus on the positives as much as possible and keep the communication open with your H. Ask him about what is going on at work. Who does he spend time with there, etc Avoiding the topics certainly don't make them go away. H and I are really vilgilent now about "checking in" with each other in terms of how we feel about the R. We do it almost every day in one way or another and that has really helped. The lack of communication kills the intimacy in a flash. Even just saying "I'm feeling really good about us and our future" gives the both of you the reassurance you may be needing right now.
