Hi I've been reading alot of different postings. It is amazing how many stories are the same. My story is I've been married 25 years 2 S one 21 and one 22. They are very supportive of me. My husband got a job in 2002 that took him away from home for a year and a half. We were in a family business with his dad and brother who weren't here also. I took care of the whole business plus worked a partime job for 2 days and did all the boys High school sports and activities. It seemed the harder I tried to make things work the less he appreciated it. My husband had an A with a so called friend who changed herself into everything that he didn't like about me. We have been off and on for the last 4 years. She is no longer in the picture after she stalked me and him. He was still on different jobs 2 or 3 months at a time. The boys and I tried to visit as much as we could and still run the business. Last fall H broke down and begged me to stay and we would start over even though he was 500 miles away. He said he had never treated me right. I wish I had looked up DB then. He then withdrew again. I look back now and see how depressed I was. We then had a tragic accident this summer to our nephew who was killed and my husband came back to help another brother. He now is 1hr and 1/2 away and wanted us to pull together as a family. We seem to all be trying and then I find out he is seeing AW that has been divorced 10yrs and has played the field and left her 4 kids to be raised by their dad. Only recently is she trying to be a mom to her daughter. She has no friends and her family don't even agree with what she does this is not her first married man. He said it was just some one to talk to now after 5 months he tells me he can't sleep with me because he is sleeping with her. He has his own place. We had a big fight over her and he told me our marriage has been over for 4 years but he still acts like it isn't,so confusing for me. He treats me really nice one day and could careless the next. Then he calls me back and says I love you but I don't know if we can live together. He tells me that I am the most loyal and loving person and the greatest mom and he doesn't know why he is hanging out with a bitch like her and not me that it is his problem not mine. He calls me aleast 2or 3 times a day. He took me out for dinner on our anniversary and for my birthday and was very nice. He always holds me and gives me lots of kisses when he leaves. The boys haven't spent much time with him and the youngest one just started talking to him alittle after he found out about the OW. We used to be a close family. Even now during Christmas we had a really goood time and are close as a family. His family thinks he needs to grow up. I have went thru the anger and feeling like I am worthless. I have lost 25 lbs. changed my hair and tanned. Everyone says I look good which is nice to know. It is amazing how you can let your self go and feel so worthless. I still run the business and work full time now so it is hard but I have real supportive friends and my sil's and his sister and I are good friends. I didn't want to loose my family. He says we just have never set the goals because of being in a family business it is hard and it has been because of such strong personalities. I guess I just had to vent and see if any one has any advice. I had posted a bit on 2940 posting. If any one has any advice I'm willing to listen. I have tried not to ask questions and give him more space and joke with him and just act like we are friends. When I get insecure I start trying to make converstion by asking a lot of questions ( I guess) that is what he tells me and he hates that. He wants to talk just business that is interesting to him so he says but he can talk to her for an hour and even learned to text message. So I've worked on that. I have listened to motivatinal tapes like Zig Ziglar. Started doing Pilates. Sometimes I really doubt myself thinking is it worth it. Has he fallen so far out of love with me that we will never be able to have a R. Will he ever appreciate me and respect me. I just hate thinking about starting over even though I have lived by my self most of the time. We live in the country so it is aleast 20 miles to go do anything. It has been extremely hard with the boys at college. Well I guess I have talked enough.
I guess I should tell you he is 51 and I am 48. M 25 yrs. Found out he was seeing other woman in October but he had been talking to her since 1st of Sept. She had told people that we were divorced. I told him about that and he said she wouldn't say that and when he ask her she said no. We live in an area where you know people from all over that is how I found out.
