Hairdog, Wow this thread's grown! Everyone is pitching in trying to crack the nut that is MsHD.
Just wanted to put down a few thoughts for you on the subject of teeth-gritting sex. I'm afraid I've only skimmed read the last 4 or 5 pages here so sorry if I'm repeating anything.
Now you'll remember I said to ask her if she'd piss on you if you were on fire? This was semi-serious. Exactly what is she willing to do to keep this marriage intact?
OK now lets assume that she is willing to have teeth-gritting sex to keep the marriage intact. It won't work. It won't work for two reasons. Reason 1 is obvious and it is that you won't feel satisfied, you will feel demeaned by it you won't really want to go there, you will let her skip it a few times and before you know it you'll be back to no sex. Reason 2 is that after a few weeks or months of teeth-gritting sex she will get more resentful and she will start to look at the No Marriage option more favourably.
If she is willing to let you use her body for your pleasure then there is a different way for her to do that which doesn't involve gritting her teeth and doesn't have to involve her getting into it. She just has to use a different mind-set. Rather than thinking "OK lets get it over with". She has to think something like "my body is a gift that I would like to give to Hairdog". That's all really. It doesn't have to be stressful, it doesn't have to be tiring. It can be a bit like meditating. All she has to do is go with the flow, and keep saying to herself "my body is a gift I would like to give to Hairdog".
Do you think she can do that?
Fran
if we can be sufficient to ourselves, we need fear no entangling webs Erica Jong
