K, I checked out Sol's thread, and I see what you're saying.
H has talked about our future together many times since the bomb in July. He said within the first few weeks that he wants to be a family, to be with me and our kids. He talks about big house and yard projects (even suggesting building a new house), buying and modifying a quad for me, lots of things like that without prompting or questioning from me.
For me, I see us together, raising and enjoying our kids, doing fun things both with them and just as a couple. I want to be a real partnership--on the same page, working for the same things, happy together and in our-selves. I want to worship together, spend a few evenings a week together working on our home or relaxing. I want to travel and play and talk and be each other's safe place. I want to cheer him on to success in the things he wants to do in life. I want for him to do the same for me. I want to set an example of a loving, thriving, respectful relationship for my children.
That's all off the top of my head, and I think that I can take that and break it down into bite-size pieces to work on asking from him. I agree with you that I need to be aware of the state of my R. And I think I can do it in a smart, respectful way.
