So here I sit, looking at 20 years gone by, wondering how to change the dynamic here so that the next 20 are not like the first. Well friend, it might be the same 20 years from now. Look at my situation of 38 years, not as a poor/dumb/stupid/unlucky Lou, but as, "so, that is one way a M can go when not much changes."
The big difference in your case, is you have the internet, books, WWME, and some other resources at your disposal.
Issue #1 I wanted to address is 6 kids. I had my limit with 2 or at the outside 4. Fortunately, we only had 2.
NFP would have had me and BB worried that she might become PG. I know you are a proponent of NFP. I am not saying it is good or bad. Just that for me and BB it would have been an issue. At this point in our M BB wanted to go off birth control pills.
I wanted to ML but had a nagging feeling, will this time lead to another baby. That worry took away from my sex drive. I think it is small part of the reason for your We're currently in a state where I've more or less lost interest, a state that I really don't understand nor like.
I know your religious beliefs are strong so I a not advising you what to do. I am saying for me, if I had a reset button, I would have gotten snipped.
Child care? Can you both get away from the kids to be a couple only, for 3 or 4 hours a week.
I don't know how well you manage your business and work time. I tend to put too much time into work or take on too many jobs one day, then a week later not enough work comes in.
BB saw this as me not caring about what was important to her. It would have been better if I set aside one or two days that were family time, say no work after 3PM on Friday and set aside some times when I let phone calls go to the answering machine.
I feel the entire weight of changing the tone rests on me, because if I don't fix it, no one else will. I'm just not sure where to start. ((((GGB)))) manly hug to you.
