The initial sex I had with NOP was the teeth grinding kind - we both got off, but that was about the extent of it. I was there for one reason only - I had determined that it was the right thing to do. That was initially the extent of my emotional investment. NOP put up with a lot of begrudged sex. Here's a link to my earlier description of it:
Link to post
In an SSM, I don't think anyone is going to go from little or no sex to full-blown desire. It would be nice, but I just don't see it happening. The HD men have to gird their loins and recognize that to get from here to there, they're going to have to walk through some barren landscape *for a period of time*.
MrsNOP,
As a non-LD woman, here's what I glean from your statements. NOP did not force you to have "teeth gritting sex." You made that decision yourself and got through it with your own fortitude. NOP likewise had fortitude and was wise and strong enough to walk through that barren landscape to get you both where you needed to go.
So my interpretation with the similarities and differences of your sitch and HDs is that HD and his wife are not quite where you and NOP were with the "teeth gritting sex." So the help NOP can offer HD is getting to that point from the High Drive side and you can help with the LD wife side. Once MsHD could even fathom willingness for "teeth gritting sex" then NOP would be VERY helpful in giving HD the support in getting through that stage.
Close at all???
But what is happiness except the simple harmony between a man and the life he leads? ~Albert Camus
