Cobra, the only thing I'm going to say in response to this is...when I do lose interest to an extent in my marriage, be it because I'm preoccupied with other things, or I'm physically tired...what have you.
This has a lot to do with my wife’s current complaints, or should I say, her latest deflection. Remember a while back she went to the doctor to get her thyroid levels checked? Well, as I suspected, levels are fine, and well below any thresholds that would be a concern. So…. What does this mean? Ignoring the fact hat I do not think she gets enough sleep, it must mean there is something wrong with her doctor!
Ok, that’s something for her to consume herself with. She can have at it. I think the real problem is that she is getting older, does not exercise, has been generally much more sedentary over the past few years (studying for her teacher’s certification, and now teaching). So I can understand why any drive she might have is low.
But then again, she does say she gets horny at times. Her answer is to just get out her vibrator and masturbate. She will not ask for sex. Never!
I consider this "losing interest" as dropping the rope for me...in a sense it was my way of letting go of the pressure I was putting on "us", on my H. In the past year I've lost track of how many times he's stepped up when for whatever reason I've stepped back.
Sorry, I don’t see this ever happening if I dropped the rope. She goes right back into her shell. She has only recently really “gotten” it that for a man, having sex really is better than masturbating.
Oh and I'm not saying that will work for everyone either...but I also haven't seen you or HD completely drop the rope either. Dropping the rope feels too much like giving up to us HD folks...so it's very hard for us to do in order to have it really have the proper affect on our M.
You won’t ever see me drop the rope either. Like I said, she goes into her cave and pulling her back out is too much damn work. It usually takes a big fight. Better to keep her out and maintain a workable level of engagement.
