Is it over for me?

[Yoyowife]

I've been visiting this site for several months now and reading excellent advice. I need input on my situation. My H announced in Oct. 06 that he wanted out of our marriage of twenty years He wasn't happy and we had grown apart. I did not see this coming as most spouses don't. I asked if there was someone else and he said there wasn't. He said he wanted a divorce, but never filed for one. In December 06 I discover that he is having an affair with his secretary. I also found out at this time that she left her husband and filed for divorce 4 days after my H dropped the bomb on me. I questioned him about it and he said it was a lie. During all of these months,he has been coming around me. Everything would seem fine for a few days and then he would become distant again. In January 07 I found solid evidence that he was seeing his secretary. I again confronted him and he denied it. During all of this time I have tried DB, I've lost lots of weight, changed my wardrobe, and let my hair grow, and GAL, He noticed all of these positives. About a week ago I let my temper get the best of me and I confronted him about him being distant. I had gone to dinner with him and he was cool during this time. I asked if he wanted to go to dinner with our 2 daughters (15 and 18) and me on Friday. He said I don't know and acted real distant. I said you are going to her house (OW)as soon as I leave, aren't you? He sneaks to her house after her S(8) goes to bed. The neighbor across the street of OW has seen this. He said I don't go to her house. I started crying and told him to quit lying to me. I had too much evidence and knew it was true. I told him if he loved her he should be with her. He said I don't love her, I love you. I said I can't take you being with us both anymore, just file for divorce. He said I don't want a divorce anymore. I did, but not now. He did finally admit to the affair. He said we needed to work on us. I said he would have to fire her. He said he would. He came home with me that night, which was a Thurs. I asked the next day if he had told her she had to leave yet and he said they had a big job coming up and he really needed her help. I thought I better not push him so I dropped it. He stayed with me Thurs. thru Wed. but then started acting distant again. He came over that Thurs. night for dinner, but left afterwards. I asked him if I would see him Friday and he said he would call. He never did. I went to his place Saturday and he was acting really distant. I asked him what was wrong and he said he needed space. I said did you fire her yet? He said I hate to fire her because she is so good. I told him well that tells me you are still with her. He said I am not. He said I came over those nights to see if it could work, but I just don't have feelings for you. I have to be happy too. He said he wants to go thru with the divorce. Is it too late for us?