If you decide to try and have some sort of R with her then TAKE IT SLOWLY. I cannot believe that taking it slow could hurt much, at worse it just slows things down. Could be wrong, but seems to me the risk is MUCH higher if you go too fast. And the risk is on both sides, to be fair. maybe what you see as her not really trying, is actually her really trying to take it slow. You are not really "dating" her even if you do start to get really close, b/c this is not the same as a "get to know you" and "infatuation" stage type of R. It is a reconnection at the very least, of two people who once loved each other and beneath the anger and hurt, still do. At a minimum, you can be good friends if you protect your heart and she protects hers and you are on the same sheet of music. Or, you can grow closer, slowly but steadily. Feel things out. Back off if you need to, but do it lovingly, yet with signs that you DO have a life other than her. Hard to balance it all, I get that.
Did I mention my 2 relatives who remarried their ex'es? They both said the 2nd time around WAS better. So there you go. BTW, it took 5 years to reconnect in one of the Ms, and 8 (yes, eight) years in the other. But that was awhile ago and they're still going strong in the latter case, and the first case my uncle died after remarrying my aunt, they had 6 years of additional marriage and she was at his side when he passed away, as were their children. No way would that death have been as peaceful, had they not reconciled. If it works, it's a beautiful thing.
Good luck, j-
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
