Sorry for the offline break - life has seemed a bit much recently and my sitch seemingly improved - W in a good mood mostly, just rolling along - I am focused on marathon training and work -
A quick recap: W left bed over 3 years ago, hasn't come back and doesn't touch me at all, she had an affair last year, now apparently over, 2 kids D 9, S 13; we are both American but living in Sweden, still in the same house. She declared her intention to get her own place 2 months ago. We still don't communicate much about what she is doing workwise. I, if things don't improve and resolve themselves, would like to give myself a divorce (they are no contest, with a 6 month waiting period since filing here in Sweden), a clear decision for my 50th birthday, in early December. I plan to tell her I filed after her birthday in late July (she told me she wanted out 2 days after mine, the 3rd, annual, bomb).
W is passionate, tough, competitive, easily angered, assertive, places lots of weight on beauty and appearance. I am rational, enduring, not competitive, and control my feelings, not as assertive...
So last night W comes home not wearing her wedding ring, which freaked me out, especially since she talked very friendily about all sorts of stuff (we had a guest over). She noticed I noticed though, and hid her left hand this morning...
I said nothing, but was depressed by it, so went to bed early, slept lousily, got up early, and made waffles on her request. I think it makes sense to give her a bit more time and see whether it is put back on (why did she take it off in the first place?) by the time I leave for a 2 week business trip on Monday. Not sure whether to mention it (though it feels like a slap in the face) at all, or turn the other cheek again; if I do mention it, should this be verbally just before I leave, or by text message or email...
Please advise - what would you do if your spouse, with whom you have had trouble for 3+ years, stopped wearing her wedding band? Am I being walked on, used?
Spring in Sweden, ice out of the lake, lots of ticks predicted this season as the winter was too short -
Luke
M58, xW54 S22, D18 M 1984, D 2016 Living a new life.
