TTHO My H did little or nothing to help around the house when we were first married and this continued throughout. I did ask occasionally for help as I was working full time in a similar job but his mother worked full time and still did almost all the household chores so he assumed I would do the same. Caused a lot of arguments and resentments and I think probably caused a laclof desire on my part.
Asking someone who has never really done much to help may not work. I wondered if you could consider hiring a cleaner for a few hours a week. Lots of working mums I know do this obviously it depends on your financial situation. It makes such a difference someone coming in say on a Friday for 2or3 hours and doesn't cost that much. Means you get the weekend free so can have fun as a couple without feeling guilty if the house needs cleaned. If you look into it and suggest hiring someone it lets your H know you're struggling to do everything yourself but you're not complaining about him. If he says he doesn't think it's a good idea you could then say what you need him to do to help more. As others have said be specific ie. On Friday I'd like you to vacuum or clean the bathroom etc. This would help me because we'd have more time together for fun..... If it doesn't work out and he still won't help do less and don't stress about it. As long as my house is basically clean toilets and kitchen I do care less about other peoples mess mind you it's taken me 30 years to NOT care.
