Do you have family and friends who can help with your son so you can get out a little and do some things for yourself? Since you cannot predict which way H is going to go it's important you have a life in place so you're prepared either way.
Some things to help you stay focused and not make mistakes would be to list out the positives and negatives in the situation you have right now. By keeping in mind the positives, that may help give you extra patience. For example, the connection to you keeps H connected to your child (the more a connection with OW grows, the less connected men generally are to their own kids... even the best of dads!!! It's a gradual thing, but I've watched it), what's the positive about not being in divorce? Etc....
Think over what brings you both closer and what pushes you further apart and concentrate on the closer?
Unless you are divorced, fully healed, and ready to date you lose nothing in DBing and waiting this whole mess out. That's the reason healing and GALing are so important. Because if things don't work out, you'll be closer to moving forward in your life. You will have already done a lot of the work. Also, if you do get back together with your husband, you will have grown and gained a lot inside yourself.
One more thing.... since you are separated make sure you do really neat, and special things with your son when your H isn't there. On those weekends take him special places, take lots of photos, do special things... this is what your husband misses by not being with his family. You want being with the family to always look like the better choise.
Also, if you do get back together keep doing fun things. You always want home, family and marriage to be the best and most comfortable place to be. That's what life is about.... and if even if H never realizes this... you make it great for YOU and YOUR KID!!!! Make memories, live life!!! And let H waste his time on the fence if that's what he wants to do.
There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
