Get it out of your system. That's what we're here for.
But, our responses are also your life saver and reality check from the madness created.
This is NOT your fault. Seriously. Look at him.
If you are done with your M, the answer is to work on it, or walk away. CLEANLY. Not messy As and not ending the M. Not introducing your kids to OW while you are still M to their mother. THIS IS NOT NORMAL. This is NOT you.
You are an amazing woman.
Only You will know when you reach that stage of ENOUGH. Get there, and then you can walk away and not look back and reach that light again. I know it's there for you. Trust in that.
I guarantee you that he's NOT Mr. Wonderful suddenly. Not without some serious soul-searching, even if your M did end. That is normal and what people do. Ask themselves what happened, sit still to heal, mourn, grieve. THEN move on.
She is a bandaid to whatever crap he's in. You know that. It's an act. He feel s like such crap about himself that it feels good to him when others think he's great. He knows what he did to you and the kids. Now he finds a substitute family to get his highs. Get real. That fades FAST.
My H also had many OW through this MLC. And it may start again, though there is no one now. Because he's still running, still looking for those highs, and not from within.
Trust me, she likely does NOT compare to you. This is NOT the love of his life. Just another OW floating through his madness.
take care of you. If this means getting away from this, then that is the healthiest thing you can do and we applaud you for that.
You have kids, you have a family and a life. You have duties and fullness to live. It is your job to be ready to engage in living.
