I didn't mean to imply that this is their only problem, and I do realize that I don't know much about their situation. I'm aware that HD does the bulk of the housework and cares for their D after school until his W gets home.
I just wanted to comment on how Ms.HD probably views the house and her overall responsibility of it. I don't think it's so much about who does what; it's all about how it's done. Because of her personality type and the fact that she's a woman, she'll never be satisfied with HD's efforts when it comes to her house.
I'm positive my mother was a not-so-great functioning 1 so I think I understand the perfectionism and controlling behavior of a 1. I know how my mother viewed her house and I think it would have been the same, whether or not she was the primary breadwinner. (She wasn't.)
IMO this is just one reason (of many) that women spend so much energy on things that aren't truly important in the big picture.
