I've been here since September, and it was bad before that. If you read my early posts, you'll see how badly I blamed myself as well, for nothing. There's nothing you can do to change your wife's mind right now. That's something that she has to do over time on her own. You will not be able to please her no matter what you do. Don't EVEN try. Don't make contact. I know it's tough, and you hang on every word. 4's contractor had is ALL right, and he never read DB. The success stories that I've seen here and there HAVE been some, have taken time and only happened when the WAS was ready yo move on. I look at myself and say the same things as you. I'm faithful, a pretty good dad, a good provider, but for a variety of reasons, I was not overly emotive with my wife, and she felt neglected. I guess it seems so fixable to me, but the ball is not in our court yet, if it ever will be. I have noticed my W. is far less angry than before I left. If you get a chance, and want a good laugh read my Christmas Day thread, and see how angry W. was. It was without any reason. If there's good news, you have your sone with you. That would help me immensely. Hnag in there and do your best to be cool and detached. The calls are thinly disguised pursuit, although her response is preposterous!
