I told him that I would not stand in his way that I still cared and loved him (that is changing though).
My feelings are changing toward him because he has turned into a monster. So,I will not stand in his way any longer if what he wants is a D. I will not make it any easier or more difficult for him to attain, despite what he might think. I will only do what is fair to me and for my children. One year ago I would NEVER have thought this way. I am most sure that I am done
I want to respond to your post, but wanted to get these things posted first. Which is it? Of course you can still love him and refuse to take him back...but that wasn't how I read that first quited statement.
I understand. He would have to do some extensive work for me to take him back at this point. I know that he is not ready but I also sense within myself that we may be approaching that point of no return where no matter what he does, it would be hard to take him back. Are you saying oyu're done because you do not think he will ever return or because you personally are done?
Personally nearing done with this phase. There is nothing else that I can do. I am tired and feeling that we will continue to cycle like this for forever.
What do you want? Before you answer...this is not about what you THINK will happen...what he wants, his directions etc.
I want what most people want, to live happily ever after. When this all started, I thought that that would mean me and H skipping down the yellow brick road. Now, I just see it as a peaceful life. Me and my kids moving to a decent house in a decent neighborhood and just having a nice quiet life with good friends and some family. Peace and contentment. A normal life really, nothing extravant just not this constant upheaval and walking on egg shells waiting for the next shoe to drop. I would love some sort of companionship and intimacy at some point as well.
Do you want your marriage...to the real person, not the monster...actually to someone improved from the original.
Hmmm. To the real person in an improved version, well that would be ideal. But I am coming to grips with the idea that this may not be a possibility.
Whether you want tobe married to the present person...we all know the answer...so that is not waht I want you to consider.
